Random Questions of a Musical Nature

If I shot the sheriff, why wouldn’t I shoot the deputy?  Was the deputy even shot?  If I didn’t shoot the deputy, who did?  And why not shoot the deputy if I already shot the sheriff and I’m willing to admit it? 

What on earth was Phil Collins talking about on “In The Air Tonight”?  I mean, that song is so full of ……insinuation, you know?  There are just all kinds of evil things running through my mind every time I get into an elevator now.  It’s just creepy.  Come on, Phil!  Spill it.  It’s time to finally give up the answer to the riddle.  I mean, “I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes”?  Sheesh!  What did you see?  Who did you see do it?  And why are you so pissed off about it?  I need the dirt, man!  Give!

What the hell was Bob Dylan talking about on (insert any Bob Dylan album/song/ditty/poem here)?  Especially Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts.  Now don’t get me wrong, I was all about the Bob when I was younger.  He was Myth personified.  If you don’t count the Rolling Thunder Review, anyway.  I’m not really sure what the hell that was.  He was all so angst ridden and shit, you know?  And mysterious.  And Joan Baez was running after him like a starving dog after a meat wagon.  But what did it all mean???

Steve Miller…….the WHAT of love?  pompetous?  prophetess?  wtf?  I’ll have what ever he was smoking when he was recording that one! 

Did Clay Aiken sing the stalker’s anthem, or what?  “If I was invisible    Then I could just watch you in your room.”  How the fuck creepy is THAT??????   That boy always made the hair on the back of my neck stand up anyway, but this goes too far!

Michael Jackson, did you really think that we would believe Billie Jean if she told us she was your lover???  No freakin way, dude!  And the child is only yours if you were a sperm donor.  We don’t believe for one single second that you are having sex with women. 

And speaking of MJ:  Lisa Marie, Honey, just between you and me, what were you thinking?  I mean seriously, what was that all about?  Or Nicholas Cage for that matter? 

Last but certainly, certainly, certainly not least, who in the name of GOD said that it was alright for David Hasselhoff to get up in front of people and sing?  That person should be imprisoned for the remainder of their natural life, frozen and stored until a future date when we can reverse the effects of aging, brought back to life and imprisoned for the rest of their natural life AGAIN for letting that miscarriage of justice happen!  I get embarrassed for him every time I see him do it.  No wonder the man drinks!  I would too.  Why didn’t Kit tell him to stop?  If I was his car and I could talk I would have told him!  Hell if I was his dog, I would have bit him!  And I know he’s a big hit in Germany.  However, being of German descent, I can tell you that we Germans are naturally so mean that if we can’t be mean to some one else, we will be mean to ourselves and listening to David Hasselhoff is how we are accomplishing that feat.  Hell I’m so mean that when I shave my legs I have to hold a gun on myself to keep me from cutting my own throat.  I know what I’m talking about.

I’ve said this before but it still holds true:  Nice girls don’t blog after their meds kick in.  I’m leaving now. 

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15 Responses to Random Questions of a Musical Nature

  1. well.. it’s like I knew!

  2. Bringing It All Back Home (1965)…

    This album also begins with a stone cold classic – “Tangled Up in Blue.” There’s not much to dislike about a track in which each verse is about a year in a lost relationship. Genius, really! The album then curves its way through songs of break-up (“…

  3. wanker says:

    lol runescape what a gay game!!

  4. […] that I wanted to ask for a long time. … Just got back here, phone call today hopefully …https://thoughtforfood.wordpress.com/2008/01/09/random-questions-of-a-musical-nature/I can&39t stand. ! – Jamaica ObserverBetween teachers, parents and other random members of society […]

  5. thought4food says:

    indianamatt~ I think she was “talkin to the hand” lol

    MelissaQ~ Did you SEE that big lightbulb just go off over my head???? YOU just cleared up the mystery!

    ruined~ Must.laugh.till.momma.spits.up. Maps. Maps. I love it.

  6. ruined says:

    At least these are established songs that try to make sense. I’ve been playing lots of Rock Band, so occasionally I get to sing songs like Maps.

    “They don’t love you like I love you. Maps. Maps. Wait. They don’t love you like I love you…”

    Must. hit. head. with. hammer.

    (Just got back here, phone call today hopefully)

  7. […] Read the rest of this great post here […]

  8. thought4food says:

    Alright, we’re just going to have to have a party. We’ll have kegs, everyone’s background music will play when they arrive, and we’ll play all the music that makes us ask questions! Well, except for that Clay Aiken dude….he just creeps me out.

  9. dannyvice says:

    Of Course I think half the country asked themselves what Carly Simon was talking about with the “Your So Vain” song.

    Who was she talking about, if it wasn’t the person she was complaining about?

    Hey, did someone say beer? I wanna be invited! =)

  10. Skull aka MDH says:

    Great Blog! I always wonder what songs mean because I’m hearing impared “that means I can’t hear shit” and what I think I hear and what really gets said can really, I mean REALLY be different. Anyway I’m a huge Kiss fan from way back and I always wondered what the boys were thinking when they set up the song order for “Animalize”. The 2nd song is “Heaven’s On Fire” followed by “Burn Bitch Burn”. Was it a religious statement? They were just getting good air time here in the south. I was best friends with our preacher’s son and we caught Hell over it, but we were old enough to laugh it off without recourse!

  11. MelissaQ says:

    You have just asked some of the questions that I wanted to ask for a long time. Thank you for being a voice for those of us who didn’t have the courage to ask. Oh and by the way, I thought, that the Billie Jean that MJ was talking about was actually Billy as in Billy Bob & Jean (as in Van Damm). HMMM. I dunno, maybe it was just me… hahaha
    Great blog!

  12. indianamatt says:

    and what was the woman from “The Divinyls” talking about when she sang, “When I think about you, I touch myself”…wait, I think I just figured it out.

  13. Danny Vice says:

    Very funny…. I like how you think. =)

    But did someone say beer?

  14. thought4food says:

    Thanks! You are now my very bestest friend! That means you can raid my fridge and drink my beer any time you want! woo hoo!

  15. jonsquared says:

    holy s**t! this blog post rules! thanks for sharing it. cheers!

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