I watched the news today and saw a story about a foster child being sent into court ordered risk of child abuse. I have first hand experience with exactly this issue. It is both astonishing and sickening how many people will blindly send a defenceless child into danger simply because the letter of the law says to do so. It sounds eerily similar to the Nazi’s claiming that they were only following orders.
In the case of the foster child, he is 2 years old and has lived with the foster parents virtually his entire life. His parents have lost all parental rights and the foster parents want to adopt him. The birth father, a convicted pedophile who is a Mexican national, stated in court that when released from prison he intends to return to Mexico to live with his mother. His birth mother never showed up for the hearing.
However, before the foster parents can adopt him the state must try to find a blood relative who is willing to take him. After a 2 year search, the mother of the pedophile finally agreeed to take the child. Yes, this is the same woman that the pedophile father will be living with when he gets out of prison. In another country. Where the United States, the birth country of this 2 year old child, will have no jurisdiction. And the state is actually defending their position of sending this AMERICAN child there and not letting him be adopted here by the only family he has ever known.
He will be taken away from the only parents he has ever known and sent to a country he has never seen to live with people he doesn’t know, who speak a language he doesn’t understand. And why are they even thinking about doing this? Because the stated goal of Social Services Departments in this country is to keep families together. NOT……I repeat NOT the welfare of children. Look it up.
If this isn’t a case of court ordered child abuse I’ll kiss your ass on the courthouse square at high noon.
Did you know that if you have a child crossing a county line for visitation and they are abused, if you do not see the abuse yourself, and there is no physical proof of abuse, you cannot report it in your county? Because YOUR county doesn’t have jurisdiction in any other county. Think about that for a second. This means that you have to literally stand outside the windows on the sidewalk peeking in and witness the abuse yourself in order to report your child being abused in another county. Scary isn’t it?
Can you imagine what it would be like for a child to be sent into another country? No offense to Mexico, I happen to love that country. The fact that it’s another country just makes it exponentially more likely that he’ll be lost.
We wonder why people are so much more violent than they were in the past. It isn’t the availability of guns. It isn’t violence in movies and on TV. (although it might have something to do with the JackAss movies and Bam, but that’s another blog) It isn’t even drugs. For the most part those things are all symptoms and tools. Until children are big enough to DO the things that catch our attention, we allow the most atrocious things to happen to them and we hide behind the letter of the law like that makes it alright.
It took My Dearest Husband and I years of anguish and pain, along with the help of an incredibly wonderful counselor who was willing to actually DO something, to finally get our daughter out of a sentence of court ordered child abuse. And now we are seeing all the unfortunate effects of the time she spent in that hell. She will never be who she could have been if there had been more people like her counselor. She will never be the happy, light hearted little munchkin she was the first time I saw her. With alot of hard work, she CAN be a fantastic, wonderful, caring, happy woman. Unfortunately, she will have to fight a fight she had no business having to fight. She should have been protected. She wasn’t. She was tossed under the wheels of the bus by the Social Services system who believes that the law is more important than the well being of children and that blood is more meaningful than love to a child.
What the hell are we thinking?